A woman degrading women

One of the reasons I shun reading local news is because you get really rubbish-y stuff being reported as "news". For instance, the latest one...which I think is "news" for promotional purposes. I mean, hey, like they say in showbiz, all publicity is good publicity, right? Even the ones that make people want to throw stones at you.

The Star: ‘Wives can curb social ills like prostitution by being obedient and alluring’
and
Free Malaysia Today: Club for obedient wives (you can see how she looks like here, just in case you are curious)

Just to be clear before we start, this is by no means a racist or religious-intolerant entry. Some people might find it racist MAYBE because this particular "club" is predominantly focused on one particular race, hence one religion. And also because of the race and religion of the club's founder. But I shall strive to be as unbiased in my comments and focus on the social point of this whole thing.

I'll start by being nice and say that she has a well-meaning purpose, that is to curb social ills like prostitution and domestic abuse, albeit the fact that she is being rather idealistic. Prostitution IS the oldest occupation in the world and it is still an existing trade. That already says a lot. Forming an Obedient Wives Club isn't going to make any difference whatsoever.

Then everything she said in the news article just goes downhill from there.

“Obey, serve and entertain.”

Club motto, I should think. It's rather sad that beliefs like these are at the top of the third page of the newspaper. After all the rights women all over the world have fought for: the right to vote, the right to work, the right for education, for gender equality, for mutual respect, this woman is advocating a backward mindset that opposes all that women have achieved.

I am not saying that a wife should fight and disobey her husband, or disrespect and ignore him. I mean, two people decide to get married for a reason...and obviously two people did not decide to get married so that they have someone to fight with everyday. That is just preposterous. However, a woman should not also be told that the reason she marries is to become a slave, a servant, a...clown?

If they want entertainment so much, they should just marry a clown.


Any relationship is built on love, understanding, and respect for each other. What she is saying is so backwards, she is placing females as a subservient to males. It is just degrading.

“Domestic abuse happens because wives don't obey their husband's orders."

That is just wrong in so many ways, I don't even know where to start. Whatever happened to all the "Stop Violence at Home", "Stop Violence Against Women" awareness campaigns? This is just like saying "If your husband beats the life out of you, it's your fault." Not only does the victim have to suffer the physical pain, she also has to suffer with the reason that she is in the wrong. With reasons like this, the statistics for domestic violence will increase, because to the weak men who beat their wives "it's not a crime, it's HER fault".

I can't go on. The rest of the things she said just makes me want to say "Sex slave much?".

This lady is also in another controversial club, the Polygamy Club. Initially, I thought it was pretty contradicting and redundant of the two clubs. But then, of course she is in the Polygamy Club, she is the second wife.

I, personally, am against polygynous marriages. Why not? It's unfair to begin with. It's always an allocation for a husband to have more wives, never the other way round. It's a patriarchal allowance. I understand that it is allowed in certain religions, but then again, religious texts that were written centuries ago ought to be adapted to the modern world, should they not?

Polygamy was allowed during that time due to war, famine, a lot of strife was going on. Men had to go to war, sometimes they die. During times of hardship and invasion, married women are deemed safer than the unmarried ones because they have the protection of their husbands, otherwise they get abducted and raped by invaders (although not always so, but that was the general idea). For the sake of the continuation of species, and not enough men to go about, men were allowed to have more than one wife.

However, in the progressive society, that isn't very applicable any more is it?

Besides, how would the first wife feel? I am sure irregardless of what they say (that they are happy, and the other wives are like sisters), deep down inside, she is devastated. People get married so that they can spend the rest of their lives together with the ONE person they love. Not having to share that one person with a bunch of others.

What this woman says and advocates is just degrading to women as a whole. It promotes lowered self-esteem, it is screaming "we are the weaker sex, you can do anything you want to us!" Think about it, if you are a man (or you ARE a man), would you want to see your mother, your sisters, your DAUGHTERS be treated this way by her husband?

We may be the fairer sex, we may at times be physically weaker, but we are never a second-class gender.

This woman should have more respect for herself.